Smirk-inducing statement of the day:

"Ladies, we plug things in all the time! We plug in toasters, we plug in mixers, we plug in our blow-driers. We love to plug things in!"

Yeah, I have a dirty mind. Speaking of which! I saw a vanity plate that was obviously not reviewed by someone with a dirty mind, the other day. It said PUCWPD. Classy. 

May is nearly over.

I've only written one thing for National Masturbation Month (to date, anyhow). Next month is Pride, and I have a couple ideas for it already, but… I'm kind of miffed with myself about having missed most of May. 

Speaking of Pride, a local movie house is going to be showing Priscilla, Queen Of The Desert — I need to remember to get myself a ticket. 

I only have five thousand words.

But I've written about 14 pages, so far. I've decided to write the story first and then cut it down, if at all possible. I like this story — it's a rare example of me having an actual plot, even though it's not terribly action-packed–and I like the characters. I'd love to send it to the editor that sent out the call for submission, too, because my first-ever sale was to said editor. 

I'm also fond of this story because it involves one of my better worlds — four countries, political conflict, cultural/linguistic/physical/magical differences, fairly well fleshed out — and I'd love to share it with people.

The only thing that I'm a little worried about is the fact that the languages of the two peoples involved in the story have differing grammatical structures, and as a result one of the characters ends up sounding sort of like Yoda. I didn't have Yoda in mind at ALL, actually; my inspiration was actually the Japanese structure of "the verb goes at the end". 

Back to poking at it, now.

Didn't work.

I'm not sure what I was trying to accomplish, with the silence, but it didn't work. So, I'll resume posting the random contents of my brain — you have been warned. 

In fact, I'll start now: I stumbled across this site. One of the recurring themes of the site is 'OMG people do stuff with breast milk BESIDES feed it to small children! People do things like make cheese out of human breast milk! EW, how disGUSting! Ew, ew, EEEEW!"

Look, so I think that erotic lactation is an odd kink, but if it's your kink, go for it. Would I try human-breast-milk cheese? Yeah, actually, I would. Wanna know why? BECAUSE HUMANITY CONSUMES TONS OF COW'S-, GOAT'S-, and SHEEP'S-BREAST-MILK. EVERY DAY. (Also yak, camel, and various kinds of buffalo milks, too, I know.) Most people would probably think that drinking directly from the source is gross, but it's just milk. We survived for thousands of years on the fresh milk of herd livestock. 

It's milk. Just because it comes out of a human doesn't make it dirty or wrong or disgusting. It's unusual, yes, but disgusting? No. 

Dear World,

Hi!

It has come to my attention that even traditionally-published authors have trouble with this one, so I'm going to make it simple. 

"Bored of" is something small children say because small children are often grammatically challenged.

"Bored BY" or "bored WITH", on the other hand, is what those of us who've been around the block (whatever your particular block may consist of) say. 

"I am bored BY your inanity," she sighed. "And I am bored WITH this…. This… Whatever-it-is. Take it away."

Please. Learn the difference. 

Some love,

Me.

A Review! And Some Thinking.

Allow me to preface the following with this, because it is deeply important to me that EVERYONE knows: I am NOT angry. I am NOT seething with resentment nor am I bottling up my rage. I’m not upset. *Huff* Okay! Now that that is out of the way, it’s on to what I want to say!

So, I saw my very first review ever! And I was a little disappointed, to be honest, because it was half a sentence of constructive criticism that boils down to ‘more payoff plz!’. The way it was phrased, though, got me thinking.

The reviewer said that Adunaid focused ‘more on the setup’ than the actual sex, and that as a result it was hard for her to get into the story. She’s not wrong in that yeah, Max and Trev do take a LONG time to get from ‘I wanna fuck’ to *actual* fucking, and that the payoff isn’t exactly the finale of the 1812 Overture in terms of descriptions/orgasms. *Waves a hand* That’s a legit critique and I’ll keep it in mind for next time. (Even if I am mildly concerned about my work ending up on Weeping Cock.)

My question is where is the line between setup and foreplay? For me, personally, I think of ‘setup’ as ‘whatever gets us to the touchy-feely bits’, and anything after that is foreplay. That’s just me, though — I know my interpretations of words/feelings on connotations aren’t always the same as everyone else’s.

How about you? Where do you draw the line, if there is one?

(Cross- and re-posted from my LJ.)

I probably shouldn't.

But I'm thinking about starting something new — something in the romantic-comedy vein. (Or at least that's what I'd aim for, anyhow.)

I have no idea WHY, since I'm on record as not being a huge fan of romantic comedies as a genre. (I have a weakness for You've Got Mail, though; don't ask why I don't know either.)

I have other things I really need to finish/polish up, though, so I may convince myself to chuck it in the 'write it later!' pile. (And YES, I have written down the basic idea for it. And I even have names for the characters already, which is a plus.) 

And, as I've not done this in a while, I'm waiting to hear back on:

 – Awydd [should be any day now; response time was to be ~2 weeks past deadline]
 – Duty […this is getting silly]
 – Neighbors [ditto!]
 – Strangers [I'm not impressed with this publisher]
 – and I think I'm forgetting something but I can't be arsed to go look right now. [sleeeeeepy Connor is sleeeeeepy.]

G'night!

A jumping-off point.

Writerly advice from Warren Ellis:

 

Identify a character in your idea.

1) What does that character WANT?

2) What does that character need to do to GET what they want?

3) What are they prepared to DO to get what they want?

 

Basic? Yes. Worth remembering, because it's where every story starts? Hell yes. Also has a couple of examples, at the post, as well as what prompted it. 

I find Mr. Ellis fascinating, but he's one of those people that I would be too terrified to speak to, were I in the same room with him. (Not because I think he'd try to kill me with his mind or something, but rather because I know I would say/do something terminally stupid or spill something on him or otherwise cause more trouble than anyone should. Hi, I'm C. Wright and I am an incredibly socially-awkward (even online) dorky coward!)